As I took my place at the barre for the first time in decades, I remembered my teacher’s words when I was a kid, “Popo’s in, girls!” she would remind us. I adjusted my body according to memory, her instructions echoing within. “Heel, ball, toe. Toe, ball, heel,” I could clearly hear her voice as I attempted my first tendu exercise many years later. Pliés were next, and I vividly recalled how she would slap the sides of her thighs open to demonstrate how to properly do it. “Knees over your toes, girls!” It was like having two teachers at the same time – the one physically present, and the one in my head. Years of absence aside, I think I fared quite well that first class as an adult. At least I got the basics right, which my teacher complimented me on for still having ‘good form’. What a taste of ballet heaven that was!
Yesterday after class, my teacher and I had our usual post-class smokes. It’s been a ritual since day 1 (us being the only smokers in this studio). We usually go over how the class went, how I did well on that, how I need to improve on this, etc. He also sometimes tells me about common bad habits and how much more difficult those are to correct. And he’s seen quite a few of them. That got me thinking then about any bad habits I may have. We both agreed that the things I do wrong are only because I either never learned to do them (I did quit at a young age), or have forgotten how to do them properly – but that I didn’t really have any bad habits per se, thank God.
That led me back to thinking about my first ballet teacher. I wondered if he knew her. The ballet world here in Manila is very small. So small that most, if not all, of the pioneer dancers know each other one way or another. They were either contemporaries at some point, or trained under the same people. Anyway, I gave her name, and his eyes grew big and bright. “Oooooh, she’s verrry good! No wonder you’re that way, she was your teacher!” He then went on to tell me that she’d moved to the US and put up her own school there.
So I got curious. I looked her up and just as he said, she was in San Francisco, the Artistic Director of her own (and internationally recognised) dance school. Not only is she churning out top class dancers, but has successfully made YAGP’s Most Outstanding for several years! Like, WOW, man!
I’m only now realising how lucky I was to have been under the tutelage of one so talented to have given me the proper foundations in dance. I know I still have a long way to go but I’m glad I didn’t end up being one of those students with all these bad habits. I was trained well, and I was trained right. She wasn’t just another ballet teacher. I felt compelled to reach out and thank her and express my appreciation. And what a surprise to get a reply in a couple of hours! I’m not sure if she remembers me (hell, this was in the 80s, she’s had hundreds of students since!), but was very touched by my message. Dance must really be in her blood as her daughter, she tells me, is about to start a two year pre-professional ballet program, while her son is currently part of a competition (hip hop) for America’s Best Dance Crew (please vote for Kinjaz at abdcvote.mtv.com. You can vote multiple times until August 29). I’m not at all into hip hop, but the dancing is very well worth the award, I hope they win!
Elated as I am to have been under her, I also couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of remorse as I went through her website, reading about her and her school’s achievements, and watching her students’ videos. It makes me wonder how I would’ve turned out as a dancer had I not been that stupid child foolish enough to quit. How good would I have been? How far could I have gone?
These questions are all for naught I know, and there really is no sense in regretting. I still consider myself really fortunate – to have lucked out on my first try as an adult with an equally brilliant teacher. I’m sure I can go a long way with this one, and I won’t waste the opportunity this time around.
Ballet Bones 